Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
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