Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
