You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
