Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
