Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
