So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
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