well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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