Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
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