we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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