someone get that fucking seahorse.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
