kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
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