You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
