Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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