im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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