Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
