How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
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