He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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