yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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