STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
