I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
