come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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