you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
