just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
This is the high leading the old right now
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
