you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize