I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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