this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
