they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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