They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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