Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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