Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
