i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
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