I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
grandma shit on top of the toilet
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Randomize
