have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Randomize
