I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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