I think i sorta joined a cult last night
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
