see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
