great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize