just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
