I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize