actually, I'm a sock model
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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