Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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