just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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