so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
