She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
