did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
