You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
