Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize