Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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