I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
