i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
