Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
