I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize