this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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